PetaPixel

Hilarious Customer Reviews for the Sigma 200-500mm Lens on Amazon

Of all the camera lenses offered on Amazon, the $26,000 35-pound giant green Sigma 200-500mm f/2.8 probably has the funniest customer reviews and images.

Here’s a sampling:

Almost better than my $150 55-500mm Point and Shoot!

Good deal from Amazon. I was actually just surfing around looking for a replacement point and shoot camera when I happily stumbled upon the sigma zoom lens. When I saw that it was $38,000 I knew I had to have it. But then I saw that it was on sale for only $24,000. Oh Joy. I ordered two of them. For only 20 grand more, I now have two 100 pound lenses. They fit nicely on my old $50 Pentax SLR.

I tried this lens while shooting birds at Yosemite but the park ranger called the SWAT team on me because he thought I was trying to bazooka the wildlife. End of trip.

I needed a crowd photo for my art director but four cop cars drew down on me because they thought I was trying to fire a missile at pedestrians. End of shooting session.

I finally was able to use this lens to break down the front door to my home because I locked myself out the other day. It broke the door down nicely but unfortunately, the lens shattered in the process. It’s a good thing that I purchased two of these.

In short, if you are looking to pay over 100 times more for a telephoto zoom lens instead of a point and shoot zoom camera for a little under $200, this is absolutely a steal at $24K because you’re saving $10K on the purchase. Oh, did I mention it’s free shipping on this item?

The downside is that I can’t keep this lens in the house because it scares my children and pets. But so be it, I love this lens. [#]

Well worth the sacrifice…

Some may feel that this lens is a tad pricey but many forget about the needless things in their life that they can sell in order to purchase this beast. I immediately sold my vehicle because I was finally able to convince myself that I only use my vehicle a couple hours out of the day. It was sad that I even had to contemplate selling my car for this camera attachment but to somewhat justify my hesitation in selling it, I do drop off my children at school and use it as transportation to and from work every day. So, once I sold it, I realized that I had to come up with another $21,000.

I tried selling my apartment, but my landlord indicated that I could not legally do that. Whatever, Jim (Because I have learned not to burn bridges from past experiences, I stopped having open houses. Plus, the lawyer and court fees would put a damper on my upcoming Amazon purchase). Where was I going to come up with this $21,000? That’s when a Sigma light bulb went off in my head.

I sold my two children to the Pesticide & Insecticide Testing Corporation. I feel it was a solid move on my part because they explained that my (now their’s) children would always have enough to eat, exercise every day, and have a doctor present 24/7. With the money I made with this no-brainer sell and the under-the-table cash my wife was getting from working on the prestigious corner of Main Street and Almond Street, I was finally able to make the purchase of a lifetime.

I even had some extra cash leftover, so I decided to buy my first digital camera. This green monster looks great on my brand new Canon Rebel XSi. Thanks Sigma! [#]

The “Big Bang” Looks Beautiful From Here

I purchased this lens with the intent to look back in space-time and see the Big Bang unfold first hand. I must say it was a little difficult to find the correct line of visibility within the Hubble Deep Field, but after a few precision adjustments, I was finally looking at the origins of our universe. Seriously Awesome!

I don’t want to spoil it for you, but you CAN make out God quite nicely while he’s assembling the fundamental forces of physics. Teaser: He’s NOT a white dude with a beard! [#]

Pro fotog

This is a great lens. Have had it for 2 weeks now. Mostly use it in macro mode in my search for the Higgs boson. But when not using for subatomic particle work, I use for weddings. One client was getting married a few hundred miles away. Of course I didn’t need to fly in for the wedding…thank you Sigma. Yes, this lens has its drawbacks, we all know about them – yes you are actually focusing on things that potentially happened long ago – get over it. With low CA and a flat field of view – I can live with the drawbacks.

One note: my copy FF a little when inside the earth-moon radius, and I don’t have AF micro adjust on my rebel xt. Sent in to Sigma for adjustment and came back fine. Even with all the trouble, still great upgrade from my kit lens. [#]

Sigma 200-500mm f/2.8 on Amazon (via Reddit via Photography Bay)


 
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  • http://blog.wingtangwong.com/ Wing Wong

    ~lol~

  • Spud

    I’d love to try this lens, but I’m afraid that the recoil would be a little much for me to handle.

  • http://twitter.com/BANANAMANANAS Josh Ladella

    omg I am seriously dying of laughter. Someone go get me some water.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=721316453 Sergio Mendoza Hochmann

    You guys made me laugh so haaard! Thanks!!

  • Adam

    Oh god I peed myself laughing.

  • Edgestl

    I accidentally pointed mine at the sun. It vaporized my head. This letter is from the afterlife.

  • Gon

    at first i was like, “oh, you Petapixel guys, always making jokes”, but then i was like “sh*t, son, this is freaking true!”.
    my wife said that she could actually take a pic of a nude beach…. in Jupiter, with this monster-lens

  • Gon

    at first i was like, “oh, you Petapixel guys, always making jokes”, but then i was like “sh*t, son, this is freaking true!”.my wife said that she could actually take a pic of a nude beach…. in Jupiter, with this monster-lens

  • Travis

    bwahaha <3 internet

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Peter-Collins/1718251244 Peter Collins

    Do they do it in SA mount for my SD9 or would I need a few more Pixels

  • Anonymous

    THIS IS THE MEANING OF AWESOME. SARAH PALINS VIEW OF RUSSIA?

    RAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHH

  • http://www.jphotog.com Hrunga Zmuda

    Shoot, I can see further into the future with my Leica f/0.95 Noctilux, and I have money left over for an In & Out Burger.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000509796293 Karen Tate

    I’d attach it to my crop cam along with a 2x converter, making it a 600-1500 f/2.8, then rig it to my flux capacitor and go on a joy ride through other galaxies. WITH a bag of In & Out burgers.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000509796293 Karen Tate

    PS: is it stabilized? LOL

  • http://twitter.com/Soiden Sebastián Soto

    You sent it through the lens?

  • http://www.colorspace.am Alex Masters

    Try f/5.6.

  • Mezeus

    I was going to buy one. But now I won’t because I know you people would make fun of me.

  • Mezeus

    I was going to buy one. But now I won’t because I know you people would make fun of me.

  • Josephgutiz

    My wife thought that I’d finally got the male extensions thingy going.

  • Marja

    That’s some serious TTL metering!

  • Marja

    I just received mine!  First thing I did was attach it to my iPhone, and, while aiming at a childhood photo of myself visible in an open window at my mother’s house 500km away, was able to call my childhood self.  “Past self, this is future self!  Please start taking weight training in school.  You’ll understand in about 20 years when you receive this lens!”

  • Marja

    Actually, no… that is a lie.  My phone is a Nokia, but adding this lens to a telephone that can double as a wrecking ball could cause the universe to no longer exist!

  • BigBill8517

    Imagine VR with that thing.  

  • DenJax

    Does it have micro mode? LOL  Funny stuff guys!

  • rinax89

    LOL I just died when I saw the Deathstar… This made my day! These guys are great!

  • Bryanchtan

    It was a great buy, so practical that i can use it for weight-lifting…

  • priya

    pls help me to know whether lens is fixed on the home door or not and how to damage it ? is ther any experiment to check it ????

  • Dave

    Unfortunately In & Out went out of business in 2016

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Roger-Dodger/100003671193915 Roger Dodger

    I used my Sigma lens to take a photo of the space-time distortion caused by its own gravitational warping.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Thomas-Georgetown/100003547535900 Thomas Georgetown

    LOL You do know that joke is on you and the site, don’t you? Tina Fey said that on SNL, not Sarah Palin. :-)

  • http://www.facebook.com/kimberly.siebert Kimberly Siebert

    if Canon made the lens the reviews would be a much higher caliber of wry wit and it would cost 10x as much and 5x as heavy. And egos 25% more obnoxious.

  • http://twitter.com/PanickedAttack BK

    nice vacuum flask

  • Moko

    I bought one and found
    Mitt Romney’s sex life. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAY in the past.

  • Bermellotheke

    Nein. Niet. Nao. No. there is a SigmaRumors that version FX-Extra II will be able to give snapshots of The End of The World, with the dot and everything…

  • Rebel Exile

    Does this come with an optional ‘telephone wire’ filter?

  • KoreanWonders

    This made my day!

  • manxdeemster

    Had to return mine. It was sucking up so much light the harvest failed this year seriously hacking of the local farmers.

  • Jason Traiger

    Definitely qualifies for the next Olympic sport: uphill story boarding!

  • http://maniacwcamera.blogspot.com/ Hugo Chikamori

    500 f/2.8 puts my 600/4 to shame. Would scare the birds out of the trees six miles away.

  • pincherio

    You guys do realize that 500mm isn’t that long a telephoto? There are point and shoots that reach to over 1000mm. Funny posts but all the follow ups just come off as sad.